Next News Network

Now for the real news, Governor Wes “More-or-Less” Moore seems to have a master plan for making kids dumber and less confident. In a chat with fellow smarty-pants Jen Psaki, he denied that book bans are about shielding kids from guilt. Instead, it’s all about turning children into ironically powerless superheroes, fighting the forces of knowledge! While claiming to protect students, Governor Moore loves diving into the risky pool of “gender affirming care.” Ah, hypocrisy! Preaching protection while supporting policies that, in effect, castrate children both figuratively and literally. Smooth move, Guv! Let’s talk book banning: our buddy Wes believes teaching black queer theory in African American Studies courses is vital. Conservatives, on the other hand, prefer an open dialogue and balanced education. Meanwhile, the “Not-so-wise” Moore seems quite fond of heavy-handed, one-sided narratives. Eek! To sum it all up, it’s essential to expose Governor Moore’s secret sauce recipe for educational disaster and demand a balanced, empowering curriculum. Because our kids deserve better, and that’s all I’ve got. Get the rest, tap the link in our bio.